I don't know where such a list might be, but I can give you the names of some of the novels that have this kind of information (some of it conflicting):
This is the best such series I know: Kraith Collected
Written starting in the early 70s, Lichtenberg's ideas about Vulcan were sometimes revolutionary for the time. Some of what she has to say about their psi-tech also foreshadows the Darkover series.
This is all free on line. More is added as time permits.
You should also definitely check out early fanzines (prior to the preoccupation with slash, which started in the 1980s although there were definitely some slash stories before that). Go here, Falcon Press - Star Trek Fanzines for Sale
The ones I would recommend are T-Negative, Spockanalia, Pastaklan Vesla, Eridani Triad, Babel, Kroykah, Impulse, Mind-Meld, Night of the Twin Moons (by Lorrah -- very good), Plak-Tow, and Tal-Shaya. You might find a few others there with valuable information. Mind-Meld was the newsletter of the Society for Earthbound Vulcans and used the Kraith view of Vulcan culture as a starting point.
Novels I have read that I would recommend, even if I don't always agree with their premises or details:
Check out the Alan Dean Foster adaptation of Yesteryear in Star Trek, Log One.
The Vulcan Academy Murders and The IDIC Epidemic by Jean Lorrah.
Spock's World by Diane Duane (I have SERIOUS issues with a lot of the details in this one, but it is still entertaining and has some good ideas. I would highly recommend her Rihannsu books about the Romulans.)
Vulcan's Glory by D.C. Fontana. (I take whatever Fontana says as canon since she developed the continuity for Vulcan in the original series.)
Vulcan's Forge by Josepha Sherman and Susan Schwartz is supposed to be good, but I know nothing about it. I do know that it's partly about how Spock decided to go into Starfleet instead of the Vulcan Science Academy. The same authors wrote Vulcan's Heart (Spock marries Saavik, Romulan commander comes back) and a three-book series called Vulcan's Soul (Romulans now sort-of Federation allies, are attacked by the Watraii, with a grudge dating back to Surak's time; second book we learn more about how it all started; third book, Spock tracks down the secret of the Watraii.)
Sarek, by A.C. Crispin. In this book, Amanda is dying and she is thinking about her life and family, while Sarek isn't even there because he's sent to investigate a Romulan conspiracy (I think -- it's been a while since I read it).
Hope this is helpful.